Underappreciated Siege

Under Siege. Steven Seagal. Best movie ever. I just got to watch this 1992 classic again last night, and it made me remember how to fall in love. Fall in love with watching senseless violence on a giant battleship, that is.

Under Siege is the touchstone of touchstone cheesy action movies. It's got everything—cooks looking for redemption, strippers seeking new directions in life, Tommy Lee Jones at his creepiest, bombs made out of microwaves—I can't think of a better film around. Maybe Under Siege 2.

Remember that one? Casey Ryback and his niece end up on a train that gets hijacked by a terrorist who wants to control the weather? Remember? And apparently, Seagal now wants to make an Under Siege 3 in which he fights aliens. Because while those terrorist aliens may have their fancy laser beams and shrink rays, Casey Ryback has something they don't—an extensive culinary education.

So, my new thing this week is I want to be a cook assassin. All I have to do is get a couple culinary arts degrees, mess that up somehow, and get discharged from a special branch of the Navy SEALs. Then we wait for Gary Busey and Tommy Lee Jones to show up. Easy.

Planning Ahead

When people think about golf, sometimes they think of old men in funny clothes riding in golf carts or wealthy young people wasting time. They think of a leisure activity. Golf was never anything like that to me. I led my high school golf team to state with constant effort and a scrupulous sense of detail. Trust me; golf is a sport and not a mere game or recreational activity. It requires incredible concentration, precise muscle control, and a desire for perfection. I would love nothing more than to be a golf professional, winning tournaments for oversized paychecks. I’m still working hard to achieve that goal. However, I understand that it isn’t a very realistic career choice. That’s why I’m attending an academy of golf as a backup plan.

There are a lot of great business opportunities in the field of golf, and I want to be prepared in case my playing career bottoms out. The best thing about the academy, though, is that I can keep working on my game even as I acquire my valuable golf education. There are some great courses in the area, and playing golf is actually part of the curriculum here. I am able to train every day while providing myself with a great backup strategy. Going to school for golf was definitely the best option for me.

Getting My Master’s Degree

Perhaps a year ago or so, I was flipping through a writing magazine and I saw an ad for online writing master’s degree at a reputable school. I looked up the programs, and promptly fell in love.

Unfortunately, the program isn’t cheap. College tuition costs are even higher for master’s programs than for undergraduate programs, it seems: This program has only ten courses, but each one costs $1,500.That’s what I get for wanting an online program and a nice school, I guess.

I might be able to save money on college by choosing a different school, but the other choice I have in mind doesn’t have as good a program. I know my parents will help out a little, but not enough to make this program affordable for me. I still need to look into what financial aid is available for master’s students -- for instance, whether I qualify for FAFSA.

The other problem is more of a time issue. I would need to maintain my income while I pursue my master’s -- there is just no way we can make it without my income. And as busy as I am, I just don’t know how feasible it is to add master’s level classes to my workload.

Where there’s a will there’s a way, though. I just need to find the will to find the way!